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| The Apeiron Argus; Issue 7 | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Jan 13 2008, 06:42 PM (213 Views) | |
| Inevitable | Jan 13 2008, 06:42 PM Post #1 |
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WOBBUFFET!
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The Apeiron Argus (We apologise for the delay and offer cake to anyone who wishes it [the cake is a lie. There is no cake].) Shock Chocolate Shotage! After last year’s annual winter holiday chocolate buying spree, Ostentia’s supply of chocolate is running dangerously low. The popular, but expensive, Falahnese chocolate, in particular, is extremely difficult to get a hold of and has recently been fetching prices of up to 500 Hemre on online auctioning sites. Manufacturer, Spinetons, said that the annual spree was far bigger than usual and exceeded expectations. People have began appealing Prime Minister, Inevitable, to free up some of his well-known chocolate hoard. Though he has refused to comment, prospectors are even know searching the countryside for its hidden location. Some speculate that this may have something to do with the recent Boodam cheese shortage. All that’s for certain is it’ll be a long time before any of us dig into an expensive chocolate truffle. Relations with Aspar grow! Aspar recently made clear their intentions to drop all trade barriers with Ostentia. This remarkable move has left doubters reeling in shock. Mr. Carl Marcks, of Boondoxia, had this to say: “At first even we were uncertain of Aspar‘s nature. Especially after that whole Nellapaland thing. But this really shows they‘re dedicated to helping Ostentia grow. I hear their trade with other countries is really strict, this action could bring in all sorts of wealth to Ostentia.” The Boo Media offices in Aspar confirm that the Asparian population echo these feelings. Many believe that this is the start of an excellent relationship between our two great nations. A relationship which should only grow as the government begin suggesting new trading laws and import taxation. Boo Labs reveal Car for the Masses! Boo Labs have exclusively revealed to us their latest product: The Boomobile, a car they describe as “for the masses”. This decently sized compact-convertable car, is built to be environmentally friendly, both in production and use. It is the first in a line of products designed specifically by Boohistory. Its specifications include a maximum speed of 150 km/h (130 mph) and 0-60 in 10 seconds. It also features a unique and patented front bumper, which can be deployed as a snow plough, a merely a method of cleaning to road. Car expert and TV show reporter, Jerry Clockson, described it as a car of comfort and sofistication, despite lacking the power he usually prefers. He went on to add that for its price, it was better than any other competition out there. Boo Labs release their car to the public on the 15th of January. Boo Labs were kind enough to provide a photo of thei new vehicle: ![]() Shock as Fairy Corporation ape Boo Labs in wish scandal Report by Cieran. Today, as I was overseeing the seizure of a batch of illegally smuggled Fairy bottles I noticed this upon the bottom of one of them: ![]() As you can see Fairy is attempting to manufacture wishes, for young children no less. Young children have no shortage of wishes making this clearly an illegal money making scheme. It is also clearly an attempt to rival Boo Lab’s Take a Wish scheme of purchasing the wishes of young children, for whom wishes are plentiful, and redistributing them to wish-deprived but otherwise healthy adults. The Apeiron Argus - Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to? Boo Media, that’s what. A Product of Boo Media ~ Unbiased views, with Boo Media News. |
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| Admin | Jan 13 2008, 06:56 PM Post #2 |
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Admin
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This reminds me of a debate I was having the other day. Is glorification of Stalin any better than the glorification of Hitler? In the end I came to the conclusion that it is more acceptable to society because, although both were brutal dictators who killed many, many people, the idealogy associated with Stalin (communism) isn't fundamentally evil, while the idealogy associated with Hitler (facism) is. Anyways, the moustache on that car is lopsided. |
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| Boohistory | Jan 13 2008, 07:06 PM Post #3 |
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Minister for Awesome
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how dare you diss the boomobile :angry: |
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| Cieran | Jan 13 2008, 07:06 PM Post #4 |
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Should-like-totally-be-the Prime Minister
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The moustache is designed with a pivot in the middle. Each side has a dirt sensor, and a Boo Cleaner spray bottle is hidden inside the pivot, which can be activated automatically or by the driver. In this case there was a piece of dirt placed to the left of the car, so the moustache gravitated towards it... |
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2:54 PM Jul 11