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Mock Parliament: Greatest Quotes
Topic Started: Jul 12 2008, 08:31 PM (774 Views)
Commoncold0
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Elder Statesman
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Over the years, Mock Parliaments had produced some great quotes. This topic is a tribute to some of the best...


Aquatic Evil/Inevitable

"I'd prefer to be in charge of national emergancies. But they don't exist."

"Ideologies of the Boo Party basically are; Do whatever you want."

"The Prime Minister or Deputy Prime Minister can order the execution of the ambassador. - proposed change to Embassy Bill.

"Bah! This country is weak! We need to toughen up! The heat of war. The emotion, the drama! It will bring us fowards into a new age! With an instoppable, loyal, powerful army the people shall be kept in line purely by fear. War is good for us!"

"The Christmas Socialist Very Bad Choice Birthday Party are nothing but greedy commercialists. Once they're in power they'll impose massive tax on the entire nation, stealing all your money. Then, once they drain every penny from you, they'll stand down from office and flee to one of the other countries."

"The Evil Party is shocked at such slander and would like to know who wrote it so we could employ them!"

"It would have solved obesity in a stroke if it weren't for those damn human rights..."

"What's that AE? Are you mad?"

"And to celebrate THIS momentous occasion and to prove that it REALLY IS the end of the world, can HRH be made foreign Secretary and given cabinet access?"

"It's a secret." - announcing the Boo Party's taxation policy.


Boohistory

"YAY I won!!!! Urm I mean, the nation won." - celebrating the passing of her first bill.

"A "Boo Youth" to be formed to instruct children on behaviour and also for exercise and other "Healthy" pastimes." - Original Boo Party manifesto

"I pledge to urm....round up the ringleaders and detain them. Maybe deport them to Maustrailia. Oh and get the army to sort out the violent people, ie: shoot their sorry behinds to maim but not kill. I ain't all evil."

"I think you are one of CC0's right wing minions recruited from his school." - after HRH enters politics.

"You both are now Boo grunts. You can propose bills and slag off the other non communist parties. Have fun."

"Hmmm an inescapable island.... with a few genetically modified giant squid to guard it, it could become an offshore prison." - upon the discovery of Exilia.

"Right we need a bill, fast, which will sort out the mysteriously ever failing economy. I say mysterious, for there is no drought, war, reperations or anything really to make the economy so poor *looks at CC0 angrily*."

"Someone propose a dictatorship bill while CC0 is away. I cant because...urm....my hands are on fire."

"God save our gracious Boo, long live our noble Boo, God save our Boo..."

"The high earners will still exist, whether they be land owners, lawyers or highly paid dustmen."

"I was planning to do a treaty, then parliament shut, then I got the plague."

"I dont think there will be riots. Well there might be if a certain admin gets stroppy about us beating his game."

"Alcohol tatses yucky. We could add something to make it even worse, so people wouldnt want to drink it."

"Anyone for a "ban other parties" bill?"

"I stand for the Boo Party, and if anyone else except me gets in power I will set off the 'device'."

"Why dont you use all those people who voted for you? What's that? They are completely inactive apart from election times? HOW ODD." - attacking the Hyrule Scrolls party.

"Vote for me. I'm secsy."


Cieran

"We only won last time by committing electoral fraud."

"Ooh no, we couldn't possibly raise taxes, dear lord no, that would make us hypocrites." - venting his frustration at Dingley's "no tax rises" pledge.


Commoncold0

"Hmmmph! You may be voting against my bill, but you'll see! In time, you'll find yourselves unpopular, your high taxes will be crippling the economy! And then, you'll be forced to privatise the railways! Mwahahahahaaa!"

"Left wing policies? Bah, Humbug!"

"Ineffective, vague, unlikely to do any real good... This is just my kind of bill!"

"BLOCKED. Did you really think you could sneak in that 98% tax on a rival political party without me noticing?" - foiling HRH's cunning plan.

"Stickying stuff takes effort, and my attention span is too low... Oooh, a moth... *chases*"

"Egads!" - after Sheepling proposed banning petrol.

"This is the only left wing bill I'm ever going to make, so you may as well pass it!" - on the Social Justice bill.

"How are you supposed to enforce a ban on pre-marital sex?"

"If they can't be bothered to collect unemployment benefit, then I don't see why the state should come running to them at the expense of the tax payer."

"I'll be voting against this bill because I'm opposed to it and everything it stands for."

"Democracy goes to sleep at 10pm. You'll have to wait until tomorrow."


DMHowe

"It would make a great headline if the government didn't control the media."

"given the intelligence of most football players, they wouldn't earn much more than 40,000 a year anyway."


Eriatarka1

"Can I join your party?!? I think it's right based on the manifestos, that I agree with your policies the most." - lying his way into the Boo Party.

"Felicem diem cotidie habete!" - Birthday Party motto.

"Truly horrid. Truly repulsive. And I'm not just talking about HRH."

"Consider thineself a prat." - at Sheepling after he worsened the local government crisis.

"I bite mine thumb at thee." - at AE as the local government crisis got worse.

"No doesn't convey my wrath, nothing can."


HRH King Charles III/Zog II

"To improve tourist income a figurehead monarchy will be established to draw in guillible foreign punters."

"Become Evil Overlord by following tips from Evil Overlord list, Have Aquatic Evil captured and shot immediatly." - Royalist Party manifesto

"The majority doesnt need helping, that was the key flaw in the Good of the Majority Act."

"We must deploy our evil secret weapon... Being Pedantic."

"All averages suffer from the fatal flaw that 50% of people are below them."

"This is one of those boring do nothing bills not worth debating." - on TV licenses.

"I support this bill for being an excellent waste of the House's time."

"I propose this bill be the first ever to be thrown out without discussion on the grounds of its severe unpopularity, its clear lack of morals and my opposition to it."

"You could always fix the elections by giving temporary bans to certain members over the voting period."

"Best thing the government has ever done." - referring to Master Dingley's resignation as prime minister.

"Make the government do something so we can criticise and vote no!"


Master Dingley

"Would like to make a party, not decided a name yet, still got to work out how this all works but I want to be one of those out of the blue ones who suddenly take everyone by storm."

"Well my policy is whatever the people want."

"Yay, I like to tax things."

"I am hoping that with AE's boo party in power I will still be able to gain access to the cabinet office just to give my opinion now and then. And I wouldnt mind the title, "Chancellor of the Sock Puppets". But I am waiting for clarification on that."


Miniyoda008

"It is my opinion that HRH is getting too involved in politics, and thus should be deposed immediately."

"I don't think he is really right wing, he just wants to be crowned king." - on HRH.

"Honestly, you're not supposed to register that the other parties exist. And if you do, at least highlight our name. - advising the party leader.

"I have the right to sulk. This is about the right to sulk publicly."

"Do arable farms have to be free range, with the plants wandering around happily in their fields?" - questioning F&V=P policy.

"All previous acts regarding what has to be taught in schools are declared null and void. Pupils will instead spend their time at school copying out dictionaries, by hand, in a variety of different fonts, sizes and colours." - dictatorship decree.


Pokemaniac John

"I'll add you to my list of heartless murderers." - after CC0 announced his opposition to the farming bill.

"In my view anyone who isn't vegetarian or vegan is a mindless killing machine with no friends (except other mindless killing machines.)"

"GIVE ME BACK MY PARTY YOU THIEVING SHORT GREEN JEDI!!!"

"Any unauthorised stealing will NOT be tolerated."


Plqx

"I voted against due to the fact that most of it is a load of nonsense and the rest contradicts itself.

"If there's no government to be unpopular, there can't be a low government popularity, so the way of making a popular government is by not doing anything. Sound logic."

"Okay so currently your ideas are... errr... nothing. Your policies are of the upmost... irrelevance. And your political standing is... unknown... excellent."


Sheepling/Ten Thousand Fists

"Fellow members of whateverthiscountryiscalled. I am Sheepling. Some of you may know me as Sheepling."

"The Sheepy party believes that everyone should have the right to put their ideas forward, no matter how stupid or left wing they are. I'm looking at you, the Boo Party!"

"Somebody voted no... they are to be hanged at dawn."

"Do you honestly think Boo is going to NOT stand?" - just an hour before Boohistory announced that she would not stand.

"Um... I don't understand any of that and so can't think of a comeback. Damn" - responding to Eriatarka1's attacks.

"Alright, folks, HRH just dropped a train on me: How does the government plan to improve the environmental impact of our nation without adverse affects on the nations currently fragile economy? It's like he read my mind and found the most dreaded of all questions ever."


Villy Trebuchet

"Free ice creams for all! Just like the recent Tory campaign, except less pathetic!"

"Everybody gets free marshies!"

"Everybody gets free muffins!"

"Crime is against the law!"

"Mean people are banned!"

"Whenever a computer breaks, a government employee will be right around with a shiny new one!"

"I probably completely messed up my question, but oh well. Still, the questions themselves are making less and less sense, so I'm not too worried if my answers don't." - dealing with Shadow Foreign Secretary HRH.

"Compulsory reading of the News Review section of the Sunday Times FOR EVERYONE!"

"OBEs to be given to toilet cleaners only!"

"I won't be defecting. Well, at least until the election."





I'll be adding to this as I dig out more quotes. If you think something deserves to be added, post it here or PM me.
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Inevitable
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WOBBUFFET!
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http://z9.invisionfree.com/Mock_Parliament...etalluser&mid=7
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HRH King Zog II
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Waffler of the House of Boreds
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Can't find the topic but the one about democracy going to sleep
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Cieran
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Should-like-totally-be-the Prime Minister
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"Democracy goes to sleep at 10pm. You'll have to wait until tomorrow :)" - CC0...

EDIT: Put these on the Wiki Page as well as here...
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Sheepling
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I had a feeling I proposed banning petrol at one point... I had another, better idea, more closely related to current events, but I can't find it.

EDIT: Found it; "I fear that if such a thing was to happen there would be rail companies popping up left right and center! I believe there should be one network; The Thomas the Tank Engine Rail Network."

EDIT EDIT: And that was long before I got this sig.
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Inevitable
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WOBBUFFET!
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*considers coming up with another way to ban obesity*
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Commoncold0
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Apologies to our newer members for not being in it yet, but I'm working through the archives at the moment. More tomorrow.
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Cieran
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Should-like-totally-be-the Prime Minister
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When you add these here, put them on the wiki page too...
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Boohistory
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Minister for Awesome
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All my quotes are made of win
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plqx
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overlord of the Solafian universe
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Can't you have any of these lot:

http://z9.invisionfree.com/Mock_Parliament...?showtopic=1172
http://z9.invisionfree.com/Mock_Parliament...p?showtopic=542
http://z9.invisionfree.com/Mock_Parliament...p?showtopic=528

and perhaps some of the turtle stuff, or is that not allowed?
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Commoncold0
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plqx
Jul 13 2008, 03:11 PM

I think we should focus on quotes related to Mock Parliament, as opposed to deliberately silly things just said in the spam board.

As for the turtles, I skimmed through the topics but didn't find any good quotes. Maybe I missed something.
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Boohistory
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Minister for Awesome
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Villy Trebuchet has not posted in like a year and a half. And even then she only has about 100 posts :P
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HRH King Zog II
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Waffler of the House of Boreds
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Boohistory
Jul 13 2008, 09:33 PM
Villy Trebuchet has not posted in like a year and a half. And even then she only has about 100 posts :P

Quality not quantity

*goes off to further shoot self in foot*
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eriatarka1
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Home Secretary
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First - that one surely gets in there.

Second, something from this: http://z9.invisionfree.com/Mock_Parliament...opic=1831&st=15

Possibly "It was more a self-indulgent in-joke with myself..."
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Sheepling
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SURVIVOR!
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When did I say that last one?
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