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A Ratzmas Carol; RP Thread
Topic Started: Sat 23 Dec 2017 04:31:02 (1,201 Views)
Morkskittar
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Yay! My Rat Ogre! ^_^
Packlord
A RATZMAS CAROL
A Ratzmas Roleplaying Thread

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'Twas the night before Ratzmas, when all through the Pub,
Not a creature was stirring, not even a grub;
The rat-sacks were hung by the beast-pits with care,
In hopes that Saint Ratolas soon would be there;

The Skaven were sprawled in a drunken stupor,
While visions of pitfights played through their torpor;
And Oksor at the bar, and lemons on the floor,
All settling down for a long winter's snore.

When out on the streets there arose such a clatter,
Oksor sprang from the bar to see what was the matter.
Away to the doorway he ran; very rude,
Tore off the doorknobs and splintered the wood.

The glow of the warp on the new-fallen snow
Showed the horror of death to objects below,
When, what to his wondering eyes should appear,
But a miniature sleigh, and eight dying Rat Ogres,

With a little old Skaven, so nasty and mean,
I knew in a moment it must be St. Ratolas.
More rapid than harpies his coursers they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;

"Now, CRUSHER! now, LANCER! now, BRAWLER and SLITHER!
On, VOMIT! on STUPID! on, BITER and BLITZER!
To the top of the pub! to the top of the wall!
Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!"

As bloodsprays that before the Inqusirats fly,
When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky,
So up to the house-top the Rat Ogres they flew,
With the sleigh full of toys, and St. Nicholas too.

And then, in a twinkling, Oksor heard on the roof
The slashing and clawing of each little... hoof.
As he drew in his head, and was turning around,
Down the chimney St. Ratolas came with a bound.

He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot,
And his clothes were all tarnished with bloodstains and soot;
A bundle of gifts he had flung on his back,
And he looked like a peddler just opening his pack.

His eyes -- how they raged! they were all a-gazing!
His claws were like swordblades, his fangs like a razor!
His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,
And the fur on his face was as white as the snow;

The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,
And the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath;
He had a bloody face and a sliced-open belly,
That shook, when he collapsed, like a bowlful of jelly.

He was chubby and plump, a right nasty old rat,
And Oksor laughed when he saw him, and picked up his hat...


"Sir, you seem to have dropped this when you fell down our chimney," Oksor the XX said, annoyance creeping into his voice, and tossed Saint Ratolas' hat on the wheezing body lying on the floor. The rat looked up pleadingly at Oksor, and on the bar and the tables all around, sentient lemons crowded around, eyeing the downed rat. Five-second rule...

The bar was empty; Ratzmas had once been a big night at the pub, but with socialists and cultists and tyranids galore, it seemed no one wanted to go out anymore ((OOC: still in rhyming mode!)). Sitting around a trio of tables near the bar were Tirr, Lacunae, Victor, Franck, and Sinclaw. They eyed the downed rat as Oksor went back to the bar, and the lemons nudged themselves closer.

"Please," the Skaven on the floor said, softly. "I... am Saint Ratolas. Someone... attacked me, and my sleigh... and now I have gifts that I can't give away..." ((OOC: Make the rhyming stop!))

"Will you all help me up, if you please? I am afraid I can't get to my knees. Then maybe you can help me to find, the bastard that did this, and I'll whoop his behind! My Rat Ogres are wounded, and I was included, so maybe we can find a way to bring Ratzmas to all, so I can give gifts to... Horned One save me, I'm sick of these rhymes! Someone just help me up already! Ever since that blasted Raznarth took control here, everyone shoots at me whenever I go past! I'll tell you know, the other Skaven civilizations welcome me with open arms and the free stuff I bring, but Hell Pit? No! Ungrateful swine, but I'm here anyway, though I think my Rat Ogres are going to die without proper attention! And now I'm running behind on my gifts! Lend an old rat a hand, perhaps? Maybe I find some extra gifts for you, eh?"

The lemons were poised to attack...

OOC: RP start. ^_^ Just RP like you do; post actions, Mork responds, post more actions, ad nauseam. This should last until mid-January, with Morky doing his best to pop in here every other day at least, hopefully more now that he is on winter break. :P
Novels Written and For Sale: List
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UE Pub Fight Deaths: 334. Pillz and Pyllz are © by Morkskittar
Dark Lord Nihilus Regarding Me: "You're the love child of Vishnu and Pegasus."

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Stop Geen Toegang! / Complete Works of Morkskittar / Ask a Skaven! 'zodi
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Sod
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Marquis de

(OOC: since its the end times and there is a magic sleigh, let's spice things up and let the drama fly! Hope you guys can forgive me.)

IC:

Sir Bacon snorted in derisive amusement as he watched the moulders clamber pell-mell into the sleigh. There were no mental powers at play, no psychic domination holding the rat ogres back from savaging them- just the slightest hypnotic hold he had managed to establish on the bloodthirsty guardians.

"Be fucked," he said, with a chuckle, breaking the hypnotic hold on all eight rat ogres at once, "To arms! Defend your master's sleigh! Kill the thieves!"

His skin shimmered as the words left his lips, iridescent lictor scales rendering Sir Bacon invisible as he retreated from the overburdened sleigh, the enraged rat ogres, and the soon-to-be-conflagrating-pub.
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Ratty Gnawtail
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Gribble...grib...Gribble!

"Gribble!" yelled Brrx withdrawing an emergency footpump from her satchel of bits, "just like-like we practiced."

"Grib."

"Alright, just like-like how we were meant to practice!"

Gribble began to suck in air through his rubbery body as Brrx then shoved the pump hose into his mouth and began to frantically pump air into the now floaty balloon-like Gribble.

"Grib Grib Griiiiiiiiibbbbbbbleeee!" Gribble managed through the pump as Brrx grabbed Gribble's tendrils and the two attempted to float/glide away from the building, the pissed off Rogres, and onto other adventure.
The (mostly) Complete Works of Ratty
Green Seer Gnawtail portrait by ShuNian)

Warlock Matik on Ratty's ideas on time manipulation
 
Red Dwarf is not a good basis for temporal mechanics :7
Sod
 
I secretly suspect that Gribble is the master moulder and Ratty is its beast. :P
Morkskittar
 
Evildorfs love you :3
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Morkskittar
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Yay! My Rat Ogre! ^_^
Packlord
That landmark of Hell Pit, Rosko's Pub, began to burn. On the rooftop, Sir Bacon whipped the Rat Ogres into a frenzy, leapt off the sleigh, and then watched with some astonishment as the Rat Ogres took flight, without any visible means of doing so, Lacunae and Franck on board. Brrx, meanwhile, leapt from the sleigh, using Gribble as a balloon to slow her fall, and watched as the eight Rat Ogres, running on four legs seemingly on thin air, dove towards the ground.

Down below, Sinclaw was making a mad dash with Sir Ratolas in tow, grinning madly. Victor was following behind him, and behind him was Tirr, who barely dove out of the burning pub on time. On the roof, Sir Bacon began to feel himself getting crispy; the pub was burning up very quickly. The snotling had vanished again, to Tirr's infinite annoyance; how could he fight a foe who refused to fight? Hen caught up to Victor and Sinclaw and matched pace with them while he decided what to do about the yelping Ratolas.

He looked up, and caught side of Saint Ratolas' sleigh and Rat Ogres, Lacunae and Franck on board and looking terrified, barreling towards them - and the Rat Ogres looked furious.
Novels Written and For Sale: List
Posted Image
UE Pub Fight Deaths: 334. Pillz and Pyllz are © by Morkskittar
Dark Lord Nihilus Regarding Me: "You're the love child of Vishnu and Pegasus."

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Stop Geen Toegang! / Complete Works of Morkskittar / Ask a Skaven! 'zodi
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Twitch
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The Broken Blade

Sinclaw glanced over his shoulder and spotted the incoming rat ogres. He glanced at Victor and made a very quick decision. "Victor, hold this this" as he threw the end of the rope he was holding at the human. "Back in a moment". Sinclaw muttered rappidly under his breath as he checked and leveled his gun swords at an invisable foe, and with that he vanished.

With a pop he reappeared on the front of the sleigh, weapons levelled at the heads of the two closest rat ogres and pulled the triggers. Hot lead and warpstone erupted from the double barrels of his gunswords. Not waiting for a reaction, he leapt forwards blades outstretched to take out the reined ogres before they knew what was happening.
Edited by Twitch, Thu 01 Feb 2018 19:55:10.


You can always trust a dishonest man to be dishonest. Honestly, it's the honest ones you want to watch out for, 'cause you can never predict if they're going to do something incredibly stupid.
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blader4411
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Lacunae
[ *  *  * ]
"If I let the sleigh go on it's current course, the ones below should cushion at least some of the impact." Lacunae thought, her teeth chattering and her hands white from the vice-grip on the carriage. But even through the pounding fear, a hint of other emotions - and a spark of pettiness - rose to the surface.

"That sounds too much like following another's whim for my liking, so, how about this? Feed, and grow stronger!"

Whilst her arms maintained their grip, Lacunae directed the thorns of her Khainite armour forwards, plunging into the unprotected backs of the Rat Ogres to feast upon their blood.



Tournament Victories:
Grand Opening Bout! (Quadra)
Warpfest (Iggy the Fool)

Event Victories:
Ratzmas 2017 Fluff Competition
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Sod
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Marquis de

Feeling the heat, the stealthed Sir Bacon grasped for the inflated Gribble, his tyrannoid arm extending farther than it had any right to do without augmented assistance. With it came a wave of hypnosis, to pacify the fleshbag and the assistant, else their struggles doom them all.

And there was something more in that grip, for though invisible, Sir Bacon's eyes flashed with sudden insight as he clutched Gribble.
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AshenEshin
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MK ULTRA - Skaven style

Tirr stumbled out of the bar, retching from the smoke, his labcoat charring at the edges. Once again foiled by the insufferable snotling. He had been so close to ending his tormentor. Stumbling around to catch up with the trio ahead of him, he glanced over his shoulder to see a stampeding pack of sleigh-bound Rat Ogres careening towards him.
The lack of oxygen reaching his brain between the smoke and the hasty catch-up jaunt left him unable to compute the sight, which somewhere in the back of him mind he identified as disassociation. This manifested in the less than well executed sentence "Do any of you think those Rat Ogres look furious, or is that just me-myself?". Tirr turned only to find Sinclaw had disappeared, leaving only a somewhat bewildered Victor and bound Ratolas by his side.
His mind, still dulled to the world around him took on a more critical bluntness. Now might be the only time he could act.
Turning to Victor and the venerable Skaven Tirr made his statement. "You have both done good. You have both done evil. I have only ever done what was necessary. Forgive me this-thing."
With that, Tirr stabbed the erstwhile saint. There could only be one avatar, that of the Ethereal Future Mother.
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Morkskittar
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Yay! My Rat Ogre! ^_^
Packlord
Brrx, Gribble and Sir Bacon floated down, landing with a soft plop on the ground. Gribble gribbled angrily at Sir Bacon, who looked horrified.

Meanwhile, up above them, Sinclaw and Lacunae together eviscerated and drained the life-force of all eight Rat Ogres. The sleigh crashed down hard, causing Franck to jolt and tumble out of the sleigh. Sinclaw and Lacunae jumped off it as it skidded to a halt in front of Victor, still dragging the Saint. He barely had time to react before Tirr was at his side, and Ratolas was impaled. The Saint shrieked out in pain and fury, shuddered, and was still.

Saint Ratolas' sack, still in its sleigh, quivered, and opened. The pieces of the shattered sleigh began to shiver, and slowly moved towards the opening in the bag. A splinter jumped in the air and vanished inside, followed by a blank, and then a line of blood from one of the downed Rat Ogres. The corpses started to slowly gravitate towards the bag.

Brrx, Gribble, and Sir Bacon approached the others, watching in fascination as the bag's opening got larger, and they all felt a pull towards it.
Novels Written and For Sale: List
Posted Image
UE Pub Fight Deaths: 334. Pillz and Pyllz are © by Morkskittar
Dark Lord Nihilus Regarding Me: "You're the love child of Vishnu and Pegasus."

Posted Image
Stop Geen Toegang! / Complete Works of Morkskittar / Ask a Skaven! 'zodi
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blader4411
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Lacunae
[ *  *  * ]
Lacunae took one look at the scene in front of her; of Saint Ratolas lying dead of the floor, the broken pieces of the sleigh and the burning Pub behind them. There was only one thing of value left.

“Every time we gather in the Pub, it ends in a mess. Oh well, who dares wins!”

Lacunae took a running leap, jumping headlong into the Sack.
Tournament Victories:
Grand Opening Bout! (Quadra)
Warpfest (Iggy the Fool)

Event Victories:
Ratzmas 2017 Fluff Competition
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Sod
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Marquis de

"Gri-gribble...grib...gribble gribble," Sir Bacon stammered, his eyes distant, before falling head first into the yawning mouth of the sack.

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Eom


Ooc: Sorry for missing the previous update round.

If:
Victor was torn between following the others or casting the sack into the fire. Curiosity got the better of him and he jumped into the sack.
Victor von Hohenfeld
Losses: 7
Wins: 11

Tournament wins:
Execution of Ikkilit
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Tapirus
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Franck Feldscher

Franck mutters something under his breath, before jumping into the sack.
^_^ Posted Image
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Twitch
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The Broken Blade

Sinclaw watched the others and decide that he did not wish to be in the sack.. Sinclaw took several steps back , paused, grabbed St ratolus's corpse and left. Fortunately death was not the prohibitive finality it used to be. Sinclaw heaved the dead saint on to his shoulders and made bee line back to the wyrdpit's communal resurrecter.


You can always trust a dishonest man to be dishonest. Honestly, it's the honest ones you want to watch out for, 'cause you can never predict if they're going to do something incredibly stupid.
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Ratty Gnawtail
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Gribble...grib...Gribble!

"I...don't think-think that's safe in there...there's no-no way of knowing where it lea-leads..." Brrx began.

"Gribble..."

"A colour? Yellow?"

"Gribb"

"No, we are not go-going in the s-"

"GRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIBBBBBBBBBBLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

"Oh Mutae no..." Brrx managed as Gribble dragged both of them into the sack.
The (mostly) Complete Works of Ratty
Green Seer Gnawtail portrait by ShuNian)

Warlock Matik on Ratty's ideas on time manipulation
 
Red Dwarf is not a good basis for temporal mechanics :7
Sod
 
I secretly suspect that Gribble is the master moulder and Ratty is its beast. :P
Morkskittar
 
Evildorfs love you :3
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AshenEshin
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MK ULTRA - Skaven style

Tier looked blankly at the blood staining his hands, not really present in mind as the body of his victim was simply carried away. The snapping cacophony of the crashed sleigh doing little to break him out of this state, as he passively observed the others present crawl into the wreckage or flee. Tirr simply stood there. Watching.
He's not a master assassin!, He is a very naughty boy!
The Rave(-ing Mad) Cave a.k.a my lab
Praise be to Mutae:fsm:
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