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- Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen - Review
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| Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen - Review; BEWARE SPOILERS!!! | |
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| Topic Started: Jun 19 2009, 12:24 PM (380 Views) | |
| Vadakin | Jun 19 2009, 12:24 PM Post #1 |
Battle Angel
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I've literally just come in the door after watching Transformers and as I sit down to write this, something has occurred to me. Michael Bay is on the wrong Hasbro franchise. Everyone knows that Bay has a hard on for the military. He treats them with respect and admiration in his films. Bay should be directing G.I. Joe, not Transformers. Anyways, about Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. I half expect this to be a mess of a review but then it was a mess of a film so I guess it fits. Some spoilers ahead, maybe some major ones so skip this if you want to go into the film spoiler-free. Back when the first movie came out I hated it. People told me I shouldn't expect Shakespeare from a toy commercial to which I responded that source material is no excuse for bad writing. This time around, I have to say that source material is no excuse for bad....well, everything. This really is a mess. Where do I start? Well the action is horrendous. There are more robots this time around, some of whom remain in their Cybertronian forms making it impossible to tell them apart. Even the ones that were given bright colours to stand out don't work. There's a green autobot and a green decepticon...I have no idea which is which. In fact there are far too many robots. Last time around, people complained that the focus wasn't on the robots. Bay has responded to this by adding more generic machines to the action. There are explosions galore, a lot of sh*t going on...it's too bad you won't have a clue exactly what for over half the shots. It's a little clearer than in the first film, and Bay has slowed down on the edit a bit but the generic nature of the machines makes it irrelevant. Then there's the script...oh dear god... Now I will give Orci and Kurtzman some credit. Their Star Trek script wasn't terrible (even if it was a rip off of Star Wars A New Hope) and there are less plotholes in this Transformers movie than the last. But that's where the credit ends. So it turns out that Megatron, the leader of the evil Decepticons is actually a pussy-whipped bizzle...I'm serious. He does nothing except what the Fallen tells him to (even calling him Master) and by the end he just retreats with a whimper. Megatron is a f***ing joke. A cowardly punk. He's Starscream with a bigger gun. Anyways the story goes that Sam has knowledge in his head about a new source of energon blah blah blah BOOM another explosion. That's what you want right? Well there's lots of that. And also just about every cliche in the history of cinema. There are no characters in this movie, just catchphrases and sex jokes. And that's where the movie really takes a nosedive. The humor. It's gross, crass, unfunny, appealing to the lowest common denominator. It's the type of humor you would expect to find in Disaster Movie or some American Pie Rip off...only worse. Everything from Devastator having balls (yes you read correctly) to a small Decepticon (I have no idea who it is) humping Megan Fox's leg...it's sh*t that appeals to hicksville. The kind of trash that appeals to no-brained idiots with asses for faces....which is apparently just about everyone. Because as I sat and watched the movie, I noticed something. People laughed. A lot of people laughed. Right then and there I knew that the worst movie of the summer so far (yes, Terminator is better, even Wolverine is better) would make the most money. And I died a little inside. Whatever happened to movies that could be fun without being stupid? Whatever happened to Star Wars and Raiders? To Jaws? Back To The Future....remember those movies? Remember how fun they were? How engaging the characters were? How is it that we have lost that kind of film making where a movie could appeal to everyone wthout being reduced to a series of special effects and fart jokes? Pixar is the only studio left that seems to get it. But I digress. Spoiler Alert! Optimus dies. Yup...but he doesn't stay dead. So why am I spoiling that little nugget of information? Because Optimus has less screentime than he did in the first movie. Rachet is left in the background along with Ironhide, even Bumblebee isn't as prominent as he was. You have twin Transformers who are the spiritual successor to Ghetto Jazz and did I mention that Megatron is a bizzle? Let's go back a few years...Superman Flyby. Remember that script? Remember the awful scene in the first draft where a dead Superman meets his father who teaches him Krypto-kung fu and gives him timely advice? Well we have something along those lines in this movie, this time involving "The Primes". But I can't get my thoughts straight. There is so much I need to say but it's just too painful. This is a piece of sh*t film that everyone will go see and love because they are all mindless idiots. What I say here is meaningless. People will once again say that I shouldn't expect Shakespeare. I don't. What I expect is to be entertained by a solid story with some decent action, a little humor that is a cut above sex jokes (does Bay not realise who the audience for this movie will be?)....how do I put it... Imagine if Team America wasn't a send up. Imagine if Bay directed it as a live action film. Now add robots. That's Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. My brain hurts to much to write any more. Actually come to think of it, if Bay did direct G.I. Joe then Team America is exactly what I would expect. In any case, Transformers 2 is an utter mess, by far the worst film Bay has ever made...which means it will make a fortune at the box office. |
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| JFDwrites | Jun 19 2009, 01:58 PM Post #2 |
Lillim
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No,No,No!!Lies,please don't let this be true..i cant stand it..this film is supposed to be the best of this year..i've been waiting since last year. Well,anyways..im gonna go see this no matter what and great review...i downloaded the comic adaption a while ago online...and it sucked but i was sure that was because they left some major stuff out...but whatever.. But anyway,from what i saw..i agreed Megatron did seem like a wimp calling The Fallen "Master" and sh*t..and i saw that Optimus died and came back,with new armor?..idk..i didnt read that part i just looked at the action...which was kinda short to tel you the truth,in the comic only i hope....(Better be long in the movie) Can you spoil something for me..cause in the comic After kicking Mega's butt by the pyramids,Optimus only talked to The Fallen and then The Fallen left...did they fight in the movie..cause i dont know if thats how it went down or if the comic left sh*t out...plz tell... |
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Just a little something i worked on...Im also working on other films...as well as an Ed poster.... http://i237.photobucket.com/albums/ff114/xiolinchidori/FullMetalA-1.jpg | |
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| Vadakin | Jun 19 2009, 02:29 PM Post #3 |
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Battle Angel
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Um...hmm...how to answer without giving it away...uh...it doesn't play out the way it does in the comics and there is a lot of action. You may like it. If you liked the first one then you probably will. |
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| JFDwrites | Jun 19 2009, 05:37 PM Post #4 |
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Lillim
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*Sigh* Thank you,great news,thanks you... |
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Just a little something i worked on...Im also working on other films...as well as an Ed poster.... http://i237.photobucket.com/albums/ff114/xiolinchidori/FullMetalA-1.jpg | |
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| Vadakin | Jun 20 2009, 05:36 PM Post #5 |
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Battle Angel
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My review made it onto AICN, along with plenty more. http://www.aintitcool.com/node/41476 |
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| Ordaned1 | Jun 21 2009, 01:14 PM Post #6 |
Battle Angel
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did you not hear this dude say he did not like the first one, so common sence would tell you he would not like the 2nd one, so quit sweating, im pretty sure tf2 is going to be the sh*t. |
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| Mssj.Vegeta | Jun 22 2009, 10:17 AM Post #7 |
Autobot
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it does look pretty decent, but they had to reinvent the story for a bigger audience (choghs...dbe) Luckily they gots Speilberg as one of the producers. I enjoyed the first one so i might like this one too. |
go here for your horoscope sig http://s9.zetaboards.com/liveactionanime/topic/7023803      Check out "My Deviant Art Page Check out "Ultimate Sacrifice- The Trilogy Begins" | |
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| Otaku_Kawaii86 | Jun 24 2009, 12:53 AM Post #8 |
Heather, what's a rubber?
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I look forward to seeing the 2nd one.  I enjoyed the first one a great deal!And I did not read your review. |
 
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| Thrash Til' Death | Jun 24 2009, 02:32 AM Post #9 |
"You will love Avatar! YOU WILL LOVE AVATAR!"
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Thanks Vafakin, for echoing my sentiment exactly. This was hands-down the worst movie I've seen in a long time. Repulsive, obnoxious, idiotic, inane garbage that represents Western filmmaking at its most hollow. |
  The Thrasher's Word: Sky Blue Video Review Thanks to Vegeta for the banner. "There's a reason backstory is backstory: it's backstory!" - Mark Kermode | |
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| Lebanon James | Jun 24 2009, 01:54 PM Post #10 |
Super Saiyan
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It's a damn movie about f***ing robot toys, wtf did you expect Citizen Kane??? What possible more could they do with the storyline. I'm sorry I found the movie purely entertainment, great action and humor. Wtf more could I ask for, especially a movie about Robots that transform. |
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| Vadakin | Jun 24 2009, 03:49 PM Post #11 |
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Battle Angel
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No!!!! No! No No! I will take issue with ANYONE who uses that excuse. Especially on a site that promotes live action anime. What did you expect from Dragonball? Citizen Kane?? It's a fraking story about a monkey boy who fights bug monsters and aliens. See my point? Origin of the source material is NO EXCUSE for bad storytelling. It doesn't matter if Transformers is a line of toys, or if the old cartoon was crap. It doesn't matter if it's giant robots fighting each other. Batman is just a ninja who dresses up as a bat. Ridiculous, right? There can be no depth there...  The whole thing about expecting Shakespeare or Citizen Kane doesn't work. What did I expect? Something coherent. Something that was based on a solid script. A movie without juvenile jokes that are as offensive as they are stupid. Without catchphrases that replace characters. Without a plot that serves no purpose other than to break up the action and speaking of which, a movie without action that has no cohesion, no sense of progression and doesn't show motion blur fights rather than giant robot fights. Raiders of the Lost Ark was conceived with Lucas, Spielberg and Kasdan sitting around a table coming up with action scenes (I have the transcript, it's awesome). It was the trio coming up with stuff they would love to see in a film...but that brainstorming session also came up with character motivation and development and a coherent plot. The result was one of the most entertaining films ever made that didn't require you to turn your brain off to enjoy. Transformers could have and should have been so much more than mindless action that is as hard to follow as Carmen Sandiego (now that's an adaptation I want to see). Here was Bays chance to make Raiders for the 21st Century. An action adventure film that was intelligent and enjoyable, with the added bonus of having giant robots fighting each other. Instead what he produced was an inane borefest that was nothing more than $200 Million worth of feces on the big screen for 2 and a half hours. Oh and Thrash, after listening to the podcast, technically speaking my review was the first on the site, not yours  
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| craigdbfan | Jun 24 2009, 04:10 PM Post #12 |
Battle Angel
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"Transformers: Revnege of the Fallen" Review Well this has been the biggest disappointment of the year so far in regards to movies. I loved the first "Transformers" by the way and I still stand that its a solid action movie. I have been hyped since a sequel was green lighted. In retrospect I thought that a simple yet tolerable narrative could have been achieved for ROTF as they had established the basic premise in the first "Transformers". Boy was I wrong other than ILM's hard work on the CGI nothing can be admired about this movie. The subtitle for this sequel should have been "Transformers: Revenge of Moments" because ROTF only has moments (few by the way) that are entertaining. Let me note that all the human characters were completely intolerable. I was falling asleep for heavens sake during parts where it was basically "time out" until ILM's creations strolled around. The last battle had to be incredibly underwhelming. Humans firing at Decepticons far in the distant. Snore. Other than the forrest battle and the intro battle sequence and Megatron/Starscream arguing and doing a great job of that age old inner faction rivalry this movie is a complete mess. Sam's parents were so damn annoying. In the first one it was somewhat funny but this was literally torture. The screen time that these two and the Twins were getting is unfathomable. As they are some of the worst characters to grace the silver screen. I saw it for the first time at midnight in a regular theater and I already bought my IMAX ticket 2 weeks ago so I'm stuck with it. What a gigantic waste of money. So sad to see characters so despicably bad prancing around while the Autobots get shafted basically. I can't believe I'm saying this but agent Simmons was the most likable character in this entire movie. This movie is a piece of dun and I feel so stupid for even spending $19.00 on my IMAX ticket. (Saw it the first time in a regular theater and I still have my IMAX ticket which I pre ordered a week ago, so I'm stuck with it) Word to the wise Paramount hire a new director. Michael Bay has successfully driven this franchise into the ground. I'm all for zany fun but when it reaches levels of annoyance that it feels like torture you know something has gone terribly wrong. Sigh. @ Vadakins Review I completely agree. What a huge waste of potential and wasting ILM's time. I feel bad that they put so much work on such a crap fest. Edited by craigdbfan, Jun 24 2009, 04:13 PM.
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Leombruno Tosca is.......Capitan Maximum 
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| Thrash Til' Death | Jun 24 2009, 07:06 PM Post #13 |
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"You will love Avatar! YOU WILL LOVE AVATAR!"
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Yeah, but I thought it before you wrote it, so that makes it first. 
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The Thrasher's Word: Sky Blue Video Review Thanks to Vegeta for the banner. "There's a reason backstory is backstory: it's backstory!" - Mark Kermode | |
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| Mssj.Vegeta | Jun 25 2009, 01:15 AM Post #14 |
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Autobot
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i think the movie needed an extra 45mins to complete the story, they gave us way too many but not enough of each in order to feel satisfied at the end. The opening scene didnt need a narrative, it gave away who was the fallen before they became important in the story It was a darker film compared to the first one, rachet, ironhide, megaron, stascreem, blackout, and prime had poor screen time. |
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go here for your horoscope sig http://s9.zetaboards.com/liveactionanime/topic/7023803 Check out "My Deviant Art Page Check out "Ultimate Sacrifice- The Trilogy Begins" | |
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| Vadakin | Jun 25 2009, 01:57 AM Post #15 |
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Battle Angel
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Ah but I saw it before you thought it But yeah, to sum up the movie, I liked both Street Fighter and Dragonball more. Even Wolverine is better than this. And I'm not a Bay-hater. I liked the first Bad Boys and the first half of The Island is a good movie. But these Transformers films are so bad...and the worst thing is people like them...I don't agree about John Woo thought. After Mission Impossible 2 I lost all faith in the guy. He just hasn't been on top of his game in recent years. If I had a choice I'd give Transformers to Ridley Scott actually. |
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